Cocktail

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In 1988, Tom Cruise was pretty famous and the world was pretty stupid. This is the perfect cocktail to make a movie called Cocktail. Where the star is big and the story makes no sense.

Its a celebration of ‘anything can happen’. The official movie of ‘you did your best’ agents.

So Tom Cruise used to be in the army and moves to New York to be a bartender. He finds the random British guy and over a course of three minutes, he is good friends with the British guy and learning all his bullshit made up laws that a bartender can make. Somehow they become famous. Because in this universe, you can make it big as a bartender. By the way, throughout this movie, they make about three actual drinks. They spend more time walking and talking and trowing shit around that it is impossible to have made any real money doing this. So now that they have been head-hunted as best barmen, they now serve drinks an another building which is meant to symbolize that they are famous. But when you walk out of the club, its quiet, there are no people or cars nearby. Maybe it was a secret underground bar. Then Tommy boy gets into a relationship with a journalist that has an amazing apartment. Because journos that follow bartenders are paid well in this universe. So its natural that Tom and British want to make a few extra bucks, so they scheme a plan. Tommy’s research consists of a poster of a big breasted woman with the word jamaica on it. Good research there Tom. Brit doesnt like that the Tom’s new girl knows the plan and then kisses her. Tom gets pissed over that, quits, moves to jamaica to run a shitty bar in a hut, meets Elizabeth Shue and unknowingly knocks her up. Tom meets the Brit there on honeymoon and, in all his wisdom, accepts a bet to have sex with some random girl. Obviously Shue finds out and leaves to New york to her old life as a waitress. How the fuck do these low paying jobs have so much money following it? Some bullshit happens and Tom ends up with Shue and have a wedding in a shitty bar. Real good decision skills Shue. Brit dies in the end.

So whats the moral of the story? I think they wanted to convey “always be loyal to those that are close to you”. Do the characters demonstrate an arc? Nope! Tom says “i have changed” and thats good enough. Shue ignored evidence of the opposite. Well done Shue.

People think that this movie was good. It isnt. Maybe it was the 80’s and we were all dumb. But the story, screenplay and acting was not very good. Its like they had Tommy and Shue for the weekend and a set that had a tree that kind of looked like Jamaica and then said: ‘hey, lets make a movie’. To us, this is a B-movie. They try to be good, and fail. But in the 80’s they didnt fail. If it came out now, it would.

Watch it if you dont care about your good old memories.