Spy Kids 3D: Game Over

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2013 was the year Robert Rodriguez and his jibronies tell the world that they need money.

When you think of Robert Rodriguez you might think of Machete and Desperado and some Grind House shit. Not this Garbage.

Sylvester Stallone is a game maker and he some how made a virtual reality game that sucked up the main guy’s sister. Now main-guy must save her.

The entire movie is done, terribly, in a fucking green screen. You can see it quite clearly. The dialogue is terrible, the clothes, the acting, all of it, just shit.

Luckily it died on us half way.

Not going back.

Edit 10 months later in January 2018. We went back. Just for the second half.

Stuff happened and it ended. I don’t remember the stuff too clearly. Mainly because it was boring dialogue with no real stakes so we didn’t care. That because everything was made inside a tiny green room and the actors had no idea what they are looking at or talking to. The cameos are there probably as a favour to Robert Rodriguez and maybe for the stars to gain new fans but they serve no real purpose in the movie. No kid watching it will know who Machete is. There was only one good line for me. When Ricardo Montalban says that his wheel chair has real corinthian leather. This reference comes from his 1970’s Chrysler Cordoba advertisement where he drive the shit malaise era car around and talks about the real corinthian leather seat upholstery.

At least it ended.