This movie was so bad, I almost broke my TV.

It costs $54m to make this movie and all it could bring in was $6m. This Director stopped making movies. The two leads that were in a relationship off-screen even broke up.

This 2003 movie is about a gangster that steals a special-needs kid. I don’t know if it was for ransom because he doesn’t get a payout in the end. During this theft, he meets another gangster, a woman, and they team up to complete the task. The rest of the movie is about silly situations that ensue where they need to act like they know the kids very well and they act like a couple.

You never get the impression that they are bad people and have done bad things. They don’t do any bad things during their time in the movie. The dialogue is also extremely annoying and unnatural. One person says or asks something. Second person responds vaguely with one word. First person tries again and get the same result. First person goes into a five minute soliloquy that looks like they prepared the speech months ago and it wasn’t directed at the second person.

So this movie was terrible. The story is supposed to be about a thug with a heart of gold. But you don’t see him being a thug and you don’t see him doing good things either. The cast don’t seem to have a good chemistry. You never see them slowly warming up to each other. Its cold, cold, cold, cold, cold, hot. For no reason.

The cast is bad and the story is shit. Why was it made? Martin Brest was the Director and everything he made before this was amazing and a critical success. Meet Joe Black, Beverly Hills Cop1, Scent of a Woman. He gets Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez were successful in their movie and music career and were already in a relationship with each other. Surely the on-screen chemistry would have been a non-issue? The guys paying for everything looks like Revolution Studios who seems to have money from Sony and Fox. They get Martin to quickly hack his script about thugs to be more about thugs that are romantic with each other. Martin doesn’t like the idea but he does it anyway. Money money money. So its Martin’s fault.

Should you watch this shit? Its two hours long and you don’t like anyone or anything about this movie. But who am I kidding? You read this entire review when you could have said “duh” and closed the window.